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Find the mind boggling weight reduction advantages of hemp seed, how to best get ready it and the amount you ought to eat to get greatest profit by hemp seed - one of nature's astonishing fat consuming sustenances. 

Hemp seeds, nuts, oil And powder are imperative for a fat-consuming eating routine. 

Numerous individuals have inclined toward utilizing hemp powder, oil, nuts, and seeds recently. You can discover these items in grocery stores and wellbeing sustenance stores since they are beneficial for you. 

Hemp - what is it and where does it originated from? Hemp originates from the nut of a similar name and it contains generally oil. 

Jocks and competitors like natural hemp powder since it contains a ton of good, muscle building protein. 

Items produced using hemp are green in view of the high measure of chlorophyll it contains. Hemp seeds have a rich nutty flavor that gives them a delectable taste. A few people say hemp seeds have an aftertaste like a mix of cashews and pine nuts. 

Hemp seed is among those seeds with the most reduced dimensions of immersed fats. Hemp in each structure (powder, oil, nuts, seeds) is staggeringly nutritious. It is a finished protein, stuffed with fundamental oils in simply the correct blend for human utilization. About sixty-five percent of the protein found in hemp seed can be processed by the body in crude structure. In this manner, you can put hemp seeds in servings of mixed greens without the need to cook them. Hemp is magnificent to use in cooking (oil). 

The chlorophyll found in hemp powder, oil, nuts, and seeds makes them have a greenish shade. Chlorophyll advances recuperating. 

In hemp powder, oil, nuts, and seeds, the proportion of omega 6 and omega 3 unsaturated fats is around 4/1. This is only the correct proportion to profit the body and help in the anticipation of malignant growth and coronary illness. 

Hemp is incredible for competitors and weight lifters since it supports vitality and constructs muscles. Hemp powder, oil, nuts, and seeds give a colossal jolt of energy to everyone. Hemp isn't only for muscle heads. Feel free to add hemp items to your fat-consuming eating regimen. 

Arrangement of Hemp Oil, Powder, Nuts, and Seeds 

A virus squeezed oil, hemp oil must be refrigerated to remain new. Warmth demolishes supplements, so don't utilize it for sautéing. Hemp oil is awesome when utilized in: servings of mixed greens, sauces, and smoothies. Include it a tablespoon at any given moment. 

There is a drawback to utilizing hemp powder, nuts, oil, and seeds. They can be cost-restrictive. The reason is that hemp must be imported. This is on the grounds that it's identified with cannabis, the prime fixing found in weed. 

Hemp is extraordinary for use in dress, sustenance items, and 25,000 different things. Hemp isn't a medication or a propensity shaping substance. You may turn out to be exceptionally joined to it, however, on the grounds that it is very scrumptious! 

There are readied serving of mixed greens dressings that contain hemp, or you can make your own. You can get granola that contains hemp. Including hemp, hemp oil, seeds, and broccoli to hummus is very delectable. In plunges, sauces, soups and stews, breads and biscuits, plates of mixed greens, or similarly as a bite, shelled hemp seeds are incredible. 

Keep your hemp seeds in a cool, dry spot. After the compartment has been opened, store it in the icebox, where it will keep for a couple of months. 

Investigate it out it an attempt. Hemp is extraordinary to include your fat-consuming eating routine. 

The amount Hemp Oil is the Right Amount? 

One tablespoon comprises one serving. 

The sum you need differs as indicated by the formula you are making. It could be a quarter cup or only a few tablespoons. Utilize the quantity of individuals you are filling in as a guide. 

Two or three scoops of hemp powder rises to around 30 grams. This sum contains 115 calories and 2.8 grams of fat. There is no trans fat, about 0.4 grams of soaked fat, 2 grams of polyunsaturated fat, one 1/2 grams of Omega 6, and 1/2 a gram of Omega 3 unsaturated fats, just as 0.4 grams of monounsaturated fat. There is no cholesterol, nor is there any sodium. There are around thirteen grams of sugar. About portion of this is dietary fiber. There are additionally around eleven grams of protein.


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missurat Jun 18 '19 · Tags: fashion

quality fake watches

Urwerk Replica UR-105TA Black Orange watch

Brand: Urwerk
Item type: Urwerk 105 watches
Model: UR-105TA Black Orange
Movement: manual winding
Case: Titanium / PVD coating
Case size: 39.5 x 53 x 16.65 mm
Gender: Men
Dial Color: Orange
Glass: Sapphire
Clasp Type: classic
Bracelet: Textile
Glass: Sapphire
Quality: Japanese AAA
Water resistance: Water Resistant
Year: 2015
Functions: Minutes / Power reserve indicator / Seconds / Hours

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The polished case multi-function timepiece switch button is placed at 2 and 4 hours respectively. The hourly integrated timer is placed at 6 o'clock. The minute integrated timer is placed at 3 o'clock. The calendar adjustment button is placed at 10 o'clock. The outer ring provides a speedometer with a small second hand placed at 9 o'clock. The calendar is placed at 6 o'clock. The blue crystal glass, the spiral crown leather strap automatic mechanical movement is water resistant to 150 meters (500 feet).The pursuit of speed is not a men's patent. The swiss Classic Series creates a versatile timepiece that is both rigid and flexible, designed for women who are looking for a new experience. Even though the colors are beautiful, they are also excellent, accurate and reliable.A 41 mm case with 101 diamonds and a choice of leather or oak straps in a variety of colours.

The surface is also available in a variety of colors with a strap. The case is water resistant to 150 meters (500 feet) and is protected against an automatic self-winding mechanical movement. Show yourself, swiss watch women's multi-function timepiece - expressively express me.Polished case, the shell ear is set with 28 diamond multi-function timepiece switch buttons placed at 2 and 4 hours respectively. The hourly integrated timer is placed at 6 o'clock position, and the minute integrated timer is placed at 3 o'clock position. White surface at 10 o'clock, set with 8 diamond scale satin polished outer ring with speedometer, set with 73 diamonds small seconds hand at 9 o'clock position calendar at 6 o'clock position blue crystal glass, spiral crown white Rubber strap automatic mechanical movement is water resistant up to 150 meters (500 feet)

nace smith

Nikhil Thampi subscribes to the belief that as an artist, one must be inspired, not influenced. It’s perhaps this principle that has seen him produce a body of work that with every season is distinctive and fresh, as if conceptualised by a different person each time.

“It’s quite simple, really. Whether you’re a writer, a painter or a couturier, it’s very important to reinvent oneself. I’ve had critics come to me and tell me that my clothes don’t follow trends. My reply to them is that as a designer, it’s my job to set trends, not follow them,” says Nikhil, who recently collaborated with Allen Solly for a line that championed the Liva Creme fabric. “I’m careful not to put out what’s already there. I’d rather take a break to produce a line that is original, than churn out a concept that everyone is familiar with,” he adds.

For someone whose romance with fashion was the result of being at the right place at the right time, Nikhil has made quite a splash in the six years since his first runway show. “I was among 800 applicants for Lakme’s Gen Next programme in 2011 and was one of the eight chosen to showcase their lines. If I remember correctly, that year, Lakme received a record number of applications,” he says, adding that it was while helping a friend prepare for a Fashion Week that he knew for sure that he was meant to be a designer.


“I was always artistically inclined. I did help my father with his aviation business for a while.That didn’t really click as I was not satisfied. Then one day, a friend who is a designer asked for my help. That’s when I fully understood that this is where I should be. I truly wanted to express myself and here was a medium by which to do it without being in front of a camera or on a stage. So I took the plunge,” he recalls.

“I am in love with every aspect of the job, right from ideation to marketing to seeing the final product. Every step fascinates me,” he adds.

Skin deep

While the rest of the world is gravitating towards anti-fit silhouettes, layered ensembles and camouflaging the contours of the female form, Nikhil feels that the body must be celebrated and flaunted.

Whether you look at his Kathakali collection, a homage to his grandmother, or Quantum, which featured nothing but metal inserts as links between different parts of a garment, one can’t help but notice Nikhil’s penchant for form-fitting silhouettes and sharp lines. There’s also the detail of his liberal use of shimmer, metallic hues and golden tones, which make his pieces the ideal option for celebrities who flit from film previews to promotions to awards ceremonies.

“The Nikhil Thampi woman is a walking contradiction. She’s dressed in something uber glamorous, but has a personality of her own, her head on her shoulders and she’s independent and has a voice,” enthuses Thampi.

Starry eyed

A quick scroll through his official Facebook page will reveal that Nikhil is endorsed by the likes

of Deepika Padukone, Sonakshi Sinha, Kalki Koechlin and Anushka Sharma. “It’s very encouraging to know that my brand is worn by everyone from Sridevi to Alia Bhatt. Bollywood has been extremely supportive of me. I can say confidently that every piece of every collection I’ve released up until now has been worn by at least one celebrity. This is not an exaggeration,” he says.

“It’s an absolute pleasure working with Anushka.She was the first celebrity to wear me and that will always be special.Read more at:

nace smith Jun 8 '17 · Comments: 3 · Tags: fashion
nace smith

The Bangladesh Garment Manufacturers and Exporters Association (BGMEA) has urged the government to withdraw tax at source for the readymade garment (RMG) industry for the next two financial years. The association has also demanded the government to cut corporate tax to 10 per cent from the proposed rate of 15 per cent for the next five years.

Reduction of corporate tax from the current 20 per cent to 15 per cent for the country’s readymade garment export sector has been proposed in Bangladesh's Budget 2017-18 that was presented on June 1. For readymade garment companies possessing internationally recognised green building certification, the Budget proposes reduction of tax rate to 14 per cent. As for the tax at source, it has been increased from 0.7 per cent to 1 per cent.

Terming the budget as not welcoming for the RMG industry, Siddiqur Rahman, president of BGMEA said at a press conference that it has not fulfilled the justified demands of the industry.

BGMEA had also asked for additional 5 per cent incentives for the members of BGMEA and BKMEA before the Budget was announced. A stable revenue policy was also demanded to encourage investors.

The devaluation of Euro, Brexit, gas crisis and more have resulted in production costs rising by 18 per cent, said Rahman. This is the reason why the association is demanding the withdrawal of tax at source.

The RMG sector of Bangladesh is worth $28 billion and contributes close to 80 per cent to the total exports of the country.Read more at:

nace smith Jun 6 '17 · Tags: fashion
nace smith

Fashion history of a special kind will be made later this week, when Caribbean Fashionweek (CFW) unfolds. For the first time ever in the Caribbean, not one, or two, but three Vogue cover girls will take the CFW runway at the same time. Never before in the region has three Vogue cover models been featured on the same show. Vogue models are few and far between and Vogue cover girls are even rarer.

Vogue cover girls Lois Samuels (the first ever), Jeneil Williams and Alicia Burke (the latest) will appear together for the first time ever, at CFW 2017.

Francine James, double Vogue (Spanish and German), will hit the runway with the generation of new stars, including a slew of new faces on the verge of global domination.

The Caribbean's three Vogue cover girls will undoubtedly be a highlight of this year's CFW. The favourite, Lois Samuels, will forever be remembered as one of the stars of the game-changing Calvin Klein CK1 campaign. Jeneil Williams, long-time Nike star, Karl Lagerfeld muse and multiple cover girl: I-D (twice), French, BNP, the Wall Street Journal (twice), to name a few, remains a cornerstone of global modelling, booking her best year in 2016. Williams will debut her leisurewear line at the event. Samuels first showed a collection at CFW a few years ago.


The third Vogue cover girl who will take the CFW catwalk is none other than the world's hot model Alicia Burke (now on's 'hot list'), arguably the fastest-rising model in the world in 2016, her first year in the international market. Alicia, a Steven Meisel-lensed Italian Vogue cover girl, has done assignments for almost every major client in the global fashion space - from Gucci to Versace to Ralph Lauren to Prada to Stella McCartney - you name them, she has done them.

They join an array of stars befitting Pulse 'Best of the Best' moniker for the 2017 renewal of the event. Carla Campbell, Pulse's Esquire cover girl, and the region's only Sports Illustrated swimsuit model - will return to walk the show this year. Hector Lincoln, another Pulse Vogue model, actor and stand-up comedian, also returns for CFW. Lincoln was a host of BET's Caribbean Rhythms, and appears in movies and television shows such as The Devil Wears Prada and Law & Order.

Headline entertainers such as Grammy winning Guinness world record holder Ashanti, and hot British star FUSE ODG will also perform. The young British Ghanaian, Fuse, will also debut his African-inspired Nana fashion collection. Famed for several top 5 British hits, including collaborations with Major Lazer and Jamaica's Sean Paul, Fuse has taken the British pop scene by storm with his new 'afrobeats'.

The doyenne of Caribbean fashion - Trinidad's Meiling - will show her latest collection, as will Caribbean master designer Barry Moncrieffe; winner of the CFW Emerging Designer Award Tiger Lily Hill; and the likes of Pat Wright, who returns to the CFW runway after a few years absence.

On Friday - Urban Party Night - heavyweights such as Alkaline (who will debut his fashion line) and dance hall celebrity Dexta Daps will be featured in concert.

And the list of CFW celebrities goes on: Dancehall iconic designer Biggy returns to the CFW runway, Britian's winner of the Prince's Trust award for Young Designer of the Year and Vogue acclaimed designer, Gavin Douglas, is also back.

This promises to be the best CFW ever!Read more at:long evening dresses | 2017 formal dresses

nace smith Jun 4 '17 · Tags: fashion
nace smith

With summer upon us, I’ve been clicking around my go-to shopping websites hunting for a new swimsuit. I am looking for something that works for building sand castles with my 3-year-old niece, rather than something that screams “extra in a Nicki Minaj video.”And so far, I’m coming up empty-handed.

This year, it appears the fashion world has some particularly weird ideas about what we should wear to the beach. Swimwear designs have always called for a mix of fashion and utility — something that flatters the figure and reflects current trends while enabling the execution of a passable doggie-paddle, at least. But the balance seems especially out of whack now, with functionality all but tossed aside.

Perhaps you’ve seen one of these puzzling but suddenly ubiquitous styles: First, there are the suits held together by a tangle of straps across the chest or stomach, evoking a game of cat’s cradle. The tan lines alone are something to consider. If you forget to reapply sunscreen, will you look like you fell asleep with a waffle iron on your torso?

Then there are the ones with cutouts — some with rows of slits running from bust to hip, others with slivers along the hip bones. It’s hard to imagine these peek-a-boo looks staying in place even if you’re reading a romance novel in a cabana. If you plan to ride a wave or return a volleyball serve, forget it.

And don’t forget the off-the shoulder styles — riffs on the blouse silhouette that lately has become the millennial woman’s summer uniform. They look cute, but you can’t really lift your arms past 90 degrees in them. In other words, they are swimsuits that are unfit for, well, swimming.

These garments are incredibly fussy and seem perfect for exactly one usage: Preening on a chaise longue at one of those Las Vegas pool parties that charges a cover.

To make sure I wasn’t imagining that these perplexing swimsuits were proliferating, I called Sidney Morgan-Petro, retail editor at trend-forecasting firm WGSN.

“Unfortunately for a lot of people, the strapping and wrapping and lace-up is definitely taking hold in swimwear,” Morgan-Petro said. And she expects the trend to go strong for at least another year.

Granted, if swimsuits were truly about function, we’d all be wearing ones that look like what Katie Ledecky wears when she crushes world records in an Olympic pool.

And of course, fanciful beachwear is not entirely new. Beyoncé has been enabling some of the most mesmerizing paparazzi photos by walking in the surf draped in belly chains or chunky necklaces for years now. And women have long opted to wear different suits for chasing their kids at the public pool than for a romantic vacation with their spouses.

But somehow, this latest invasion of look-at-me swimwear seems especially inescapable this summer. It’s not just daring high-fashion brands that are getting in on the trend. Macy’s, for example, is hawking a Kenneth Cole number that looks like it is held together by pirate-ship netting. Kohl’s is offering high-waisted bikini bottoms with a jumble of straps that are sure to squeeze your flesh like a meat tie around a tenderloin.

Target, the everywoman big-box chain that claims to have the No. 1 market share in the swim business, is also touting the aesthetic. One suit, with a big fabric cross stretching across the belly, is described as offering “slimming control.”

Pro tip: An X on your tummy is never, under any circumstances, going to be slenderizing.

Plus, these overwrought suits can just be a hassle. A colleague confessed she recently had fallen for the Instagram glamour of a complicated monokini (a range of swimwear that includes bikinis where the top and bottom are linked by a fragile fabric isthmus, as well as one-piece suits sliced by so many peek-a-boo cutouts they might as well be two-pieces.)

She knew it was a mistake the moment it betrayed her in some choppy ocean water. It took the help of two friends to tie herself back into it. A swimsuit shouldn’t require wardrobe assistants.

The rise of less-than-functional swimwear makes a bit more sense when you consider other currents swirling in the apparel business. Performance athletic gear, too, is increasingly getting excessively clever. This is why you see mesh or lace panels in your running tights, or elegantly draped yoga tops that inconveniently flip over your face when you do a handstand.

As with every recent sartorial development, social media probably helped create this. When so much of our lives are captured on film and shared with our international network of friends, retailers probably thought they’d best serve us by offering more distinctive swimsuits. (You don’t want that inflatable pool swan to be the most eye-catching thing in your Facebook post, do you?)

But retailers go big with these silly suits at their own peril. I’ve covered the industry for about two and a half years, writing about all kinds of purchases — toys, groceries, electronics, home furnishings. And I can’t think of any category that generates more reader complaints than apparel — specifically, women’s frustrations over their inability to find clothing brands that they deem flattering and inclusive.

These styles are the opposite of what these legions of women are looking for — and are ready to spend big bucks for. Consider the effect of a bikini with corset-style lacing on the hips. Terrific! What woman hasn’t been dreaming of having five muffin tops instead of just one?

Or think about a one-piece with a big hole over the stomach. Ah, the dignity of feeling that you look like a Care Bear.Read more at:evening dresses australia | formal evening dresses

nace smith Jun 1 '17 · Tags: fashion
nace smith

For designer Rachel Roy, success isn’t something she takes for granted. Landing her first job at 14 years old, Roy has an inspiring work ethic and shows how her upbringing impacted her life in a range of ways. She writes in on fascinating personal facts…

Vogue was the Cabbage Patch of my childhood: I collected Vogue magazines as a child. I still have and use all of them (for research) to this day. My brother and I were raised with very little, so no Cabbage Patch, Hello Kitty, or other adorable collectibles most children were hoarding at the time. I had enough to buy a magazine every month and it was always Vogue. I have a healthy love for the original supermodels—Yasmeen Ghauri! Love the early ’90s editions.

Oprah made me nervous: I was so nervous the first time I went on The Oprah Winfrey Show (she called me the next Big Name in Fashion—no pressure, right?) that I forgot to put my earrings on before leaving the green room to tape. When I called my friends to see how I did, the first thing they said was, “You looked naked, where were your earrings?” No, “Great job Rach!” They had their priorities all over the place with me.

A memory that had the biggest impact on my life: When I was 3 I was crossing the street in India with my father and saw a young girl with burned hands begging for money. I remember being upset that my father only gave her a few coins and we kept walking. In many ways part of my soul has stayed with that young girl and I will never fully have peace until neglected children are protected.

How I feed my soul: There is a little girl in India who I and my daughter met whom we are putting through school this year with an organization I have worked with for years, Children’s Hope India. Receiving her pictures and seeing how much healthier she has become since we met her is a highlight in our lives.

My greatest fear is one of my deepest loves: I grew up by the ocean in the Monterey Bay, California. The Bay is as deep as the Grand Canyon and an ideal home for Great Whites. Because of this I have a huge fear of open water to this day. But my happy place is the sea…go figure.

I’ve worked since I was 14: My dad dropped me off at McDonald’s and told me to not come home until I had a job and could start contributing to the household expenses. I took a bus from McDonald’s to the mall and begged the manager at Contempo Casuals to hire me. I ended up working there through high school. They made me an assistant manager at 16 and transferred me to their Washington, DC location when I went to college. This is where I learned how women feel when they try clothes on. I wasn’t the best sales girl but I was manager before I was 18 because I learned quickly on the job and cared deeply about how fashion can transform a mood, and someone’s day, week, and yes, life.

I had a strict upbringing: I was raised Seventh-day Adventist, which like the Jewish religion means sundown Friday to sundown Saturday is holy. Also no pork and no caffeine. Lots of no’s—they were ahead of their time, health-wise!

My parents’ greatest gift to me was travel: One of the most valuable things my parents did for me as a child was to take me to third-world countries like Africa and India. The experiences were beyond my biggest life lessons. Today, I have my daughters work for World of Children so they can see that children in different parts of the world are not so lucky and it’s our responsibility to help.

My first and biggest crush…: Fashion dreaming is what got me through my childhood—that and George Michael. At 12 I went on a trip with my father’s college students to England and Scotland just to look for George…seriously. Needless to say, I did not find him but I got to hang out in a bunch of beautiful cities, which opened my eyes to the possibilities of a world outside of my small hippie chic town.

My obsession is learning: My goal is to learn something new each day. Curiosity is what motivates me, and kindness, confidence, and intelligence is what I find attractive in male and female friends. When I get a massage, I listen to Wayne Dyer instead of tranquil music because I am at full mental attention to absorb, listen, and learn. It has changed my life!Read more at:red formal dresses | white formal dresses

nace smith May 30 '17 · Tags: fashion
nace smith

According to style guru Alexander McQueen, "Fashion should be about escapism." So this June, break away from the mundane and escape to the greatest runway to have ever graced our green shores - Caribbean Fashionweek (CFW) 2017.

On Wednesday night, sponsors, models, and socialites, all decked out in fashionable ensemble, gathered at the home of Porsche Jamaica to celebrate the launch of the island's premiere fashion showcase. Paparazzi made sure to capture all the glamour on display as they mingled with familiar and unfamiliar faces, indulging in delectable hors d'oeuvres, courtesy of A-Bar Restaurant and Lounge, accompanied by an array of cocktails to choose from.

The formal proceeding was short and sweet, featuring the man of the season, Kingsley Cooper, saying a few words, along with his daughter Safia, followed by the sponsors. Then DJ Sanjay took over, encouraging all to relax and unwind to the pulsating beats.

Deemed the Best of the Best, Pulse International is gearing up to deliver a stunning show-stopping week, boasting top fashion designs from Jamaica and the Caribbean, modelled by some of the fiercest 'strutters' they have had over the years.

So from June 7-11, fasten your seat belts, start your engines, and let Porsche and Pulse take you on the ride of a lifetime through the best of the best in fashion with CFW.Read more at:bridesmaid dress |

nace smith May 25 '17 · Tags: fashion
nace smith
(Photo:elegant evening dresses)

Even using a primer, eyeshadows can slip and fade - especially if the weather's hot and you end up sweating. But cream eyeshadows are a good way to ensure your look stays in place through the day and evening. And when it comes to making an impact with your make-up, metallic cream eyeshadows are the way forward. Whether you're a fan of bronze, silver, gold or even rose gold, there are a host of products on the market that can make your eyes pop without busting the budget.

Primark Beauty PS... PRISM Glitter Obsessed Palette is at the very top of our wish list, thanks to its purse-friendly price and 28 incredible shades. Hues in the palette range from iridescent silver to white and lilac tones and it allows fans to add some dazzle to their peepers quickly and easily. The palette is also a good choice for festivals as it can be packed in a small bag to provide a huge variety of looks. If you're a mermaid lover, then pick up one of these palettes too - the opalescent shine in the shadows is the perfect way to recreate a sea maiden look.

For a slightly more expensive option, try INGLOT Aquastic Cream Eye Shadow, a brand new eye shadow formulation. This water-based product will ensure a long lasting effect with a subtle or stronger shine depending on the application., with even a minimal amount resulting in strong coverage. Our favourite is the rose shade, with another selling point for the product being that even though it's long lasting, it can be removed using just plain water.

Celebrity make-up artist Charlotte Tillbury is also a fan of metallic cream shadows, with her Eyes to Mesmerise product a favourite thanks to its cream-to-sheen formula and the ability to deliver maximum impact with minimum effort. If it's good enough for the Kardashians, it's good enough for us!Read more at:cocktail dress australia

nace smith May 23 '17 · Tags: fashion
nace smith
(Photo:formal dress shops brisbane)

I’M about to talk about pageants, but stay with me.

Yes, I know that the word “pageant” is frowned upon, referred to as “outdated”, “sexist” and “backwards.” So much so one of New Zealand’s national pageants is now referred to as a “competition” and refuses to use the word pageant at all. Yawn.

But I, for one, am here to testify that pageants aren’t just big hair, tiaras and YouTube fail compilations waiting to happen. In fact, these are the parts of pageants I remember the least. Or have conveniently chosen to forget.

Being on the pageant circuit wasn’t glamorous and it wasn’t easy, but it was one of the best times of my life.

Here are my top 10 confessions as a former Kiwi beauty queen.

1. You’ve got to be tough

Being a beauty queen in New Zealand is hard. Because most New Zealanders do not like pageants. And that’s okay.

But as a contestant, you’ll need to be tough, have a sense of humour, and be willing to forgo the largest portion of your dignity in order to succeed.

If you fall on stage, have a wardrobe slip or share an Anzac remembrance post wearing a bikini and army hat and caption it “Unless we forget” (yes, someone actually did this. And no, it wasn’t me) you will be made fun of.

So you’ve got to be tough.

A pageant commentator once suggested I should cut my head off if I wanted to win the pageant. He even suggested whose head I could replace it with. So I burned his house down.

Just kidding! It was a lesson in getting tough, rather than even. That came later ...

2. Hide your heels, hide your cereal

There is some truth to the claim that pageant girls can get a little crazy and super competitive.

In an attempt to sabotage me, a fellow competitor stole all of my left shoes.

Upon looking under her bed and discovering what can only be described as a hoard of left-footed hooker heels, I made a pact to never let myself get that crazy.

And I kept it. Right up until I hid her cereal as revenge. I don’t know what I was trying to achieve with that. But it felt right when I was in pageant land, where it can be hard to see things rationally.

3. You’ll need two cans of hairspray and a lot of Vaseline

These are your tools. Your best friends. And they may also kill you; these and rhinestones.

Vaseline will need to be liberally applied to your teeth in order to make sure that your mouth doesn’t get dry from all of the open mouth smiling you’re expected to pull 24/7.

As for the hairspray, I recommend two cans: One for your hair and one for your butt. That’s right. You will need one full can of strong hold hairspray for your tushie to ensure your bikini doesn’t slip up.

In case you were wondering how it works, simply spray a lacquer-based hairspray on your (or your friend’s) cheeks and voila! You’re good to go.

The other bottle will be used to make your hair bigger than the other contestants because “The bigger the hair, the closer to God.” Bless your soul, Dolly Parton. You get it.

4. Never wear white bikini bottoms

You will likely be made to wear whatever swimsuit the obliging sponsor has provided.

Do not accept the white one like I did, believing white would bring out my gorgeous tangerine tan. That I would stand out and look fresh, fun and like an Amazonian goddess.

I also didn’t expect that they’d put lights at the base of the stage, shining right up at the centre of our crotches. But they did.

Duct tape, bandaids and a lot of embarrassment later, I was ready to rock.

5. If in doubt, lie

Everything you say in a pageant will probably be a lie. Why? Because you’re expected to be perfect when, in fact, you’re only human. So you will rehearse all the questions the judges could possibly ask you and invent the best possible answer. Observe:

Charity work? “I’ve done loads of it.”

War? “Hate it.”

World peace? “Love the stuff.”

Don’t know the answer? Talk about something else.

Eg: What is your take on the war in Syria?”

“War destroys lives. Lives are precious. This reminds me of a child I met in Africa while doing charity work.”

6. The girl in the turtle costume is your greatest ally

You are going to need friends in this process. Find one you can laugh with. I found mine when I spotted a turtle costume backstage and a small voice came from the other side of the room that whispered: “Put it on.”

So I did. She laughed. She put it on. I laughed. This is the basis of a true pageant friendship.

7. You might vomit in front of the Thai Ambassador

Pageants can take you all over the world. Mine took me to Thailand as an ambassador for New Zealand.

I loved Thailand: the people, the culture and the food. So I immersed myself in all of it, particularly the food. On day two of my trip I was at a formal Parliament lunch when I began to feel sick.

I excused myself and went outside into the scorching heat. The Thai Ambassador came to check on me and I proceeded to vomit everywhere.

No matter how many times you say sorry for something like this, it is never enough to return any of the dignity you have lost.

8. Your sash means everything and nothing

When you win a sash you are so proud of that damn thing. You display it proudly and wear it whenever you get the chance.

I wore mine to town after I won (yes, I cringed writing that). But I skipped all the lines, got free drinks and had the best night of my life.

Be warned though, when you are wearing said sash people will ask you to do a range of strange things:

“Hold my baby.”

“Hold hands and walk into the painting.”

“Pretend you are eating this big piece of cake, but definitely don’t.”

The sash is a funny, powerful thing. Know how to use the sash. Use it for good and never evil.

9. Your diet and exercise regimen will make you evil

Before I entered my first pageant I had just lost a lot of weight. I decided to enter to take myself out of my comfort zone. It worked.

Preparing for a pageant is tough. I spent my days training, going to the gym, tanning, going to beauty appointments and watching every calorie I consumed.

As anyone on a restricted diet knows, it can turn you into a mean girl.

During this phase, my flatmate brought a burger home for dinner. I unleashed hell: “How could you be so awful?!” I screamed at her before slamming my door and putting myself to bed at 6.30pm; a habit I developed to curb late-night hunger pains.

I would like to say this was an isolated incident. It wasn’t.

The day after I won my pageant I demolished a six pack of cupcakes with one of my fellow contestants and regretted nothing.

10. You are not an All Black and should never refer to yourself as one.

This is the big one. You need to remember this, always. Do not let the pageant world swallow you up so much that you find yourself saying the following sentence: “Ladies, we are basically female versions of the All Blacks. Every woman wants to be like us!”

This was uttered by a fellow contestant and I have never cringed more in my life.

You are not a female version of an All Black. You are simply in a contest where a group of strangers will tell you your current worth based on your face, body, personality, and intelligence.

It’s hard to put yourself out there to be judged and you need to be confident enough to know that while you are beautiful just as you are, you may not be the judge’s favourite on the night. That is totally okay. You are still awesome and worthy.Read more at:cheap formal dresses melbourne

nace smith May 21 '17 · Tags: fashion
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